On Uprooting Your Life and Anchoring in the Newness of Change

A month ago I decided to move states. Physical states, from Sydney to Melbourne, Australia. I'd lived in Sydney for 36 years and my time there was closing. It was the ending of a chapter I thought. Not realising at the time that it was also the ending of a book.

It was a month of upheaval, releasing, and goodbyes. I cleared the house of years of accumulated clutter. All the things that had once been so important to me now felt like they were weighing me down. It all had to go. I felt ruthless at times, the way I was rejecting memories of my life. I knew though, that I didn't need them as place holders of the past any more. I had moved beyond the need for physical signs of who I had been. I didn't feel less for it.

On the contrary, the clearing was making way for a new me. A me that had been quietly waiting for the moment when I could step forward, confident and secure in the inner knowledge of who I am. No longer unconsciously requiring objects, things, or people to affirm my value. The inner monologue had changed to one which was self valuing, self loving, and self aware.

And now I'm sitting in an Airbnb while I begin the search for my new home. With what is left of my belongings in storage, I have a freedom I've not experienced before. There are moments when I feel untethered, but the energy of change stirs within me and I feel myself turning to face a future that is as yet uncertain, undefined, unlimited.

When I woke a month ago with the unshakeable knowing that it was time to move, I began a deep lesson in trust. I thought I had always trusted: the universe, my team, my higher self, my connection to source. But never had I needed to trust myself more than in that moment of deciding to uproot my life from everything and everyone I knew, and start again.

There are so many ways our lives can be uprooted - it doesn't have to be as dramatic as a move from one city to another. 

We can experience this pulling up energy when we end relationships, friendships, jobs or careers. It can even be with a simple move from home to another, one suburb to another. 

Just like when we pot up a new plant, or take a seedling and transfer to a bigger pot, it takes a little time for the plant to settle in, take root, and begin to grow. 

During that time the little plant needs some tenderness. Gentle care to ensure it receives all the support and nutrients it needs so it has all it needs to have the best chance of thriving.

And this is the difference between surviving and thriving. Any plant can survive given the basic conditions.

But to thrive, it needs optimal conditions to be available. This means the perfect mix of sunlight, water, nutrients, and love.

So too with people. When we go through change, when we're uprooted from all that we know, we need to place ourselves in the best position possible so that thriving becomes a normal way of life.

How do we do that? How do we support ourselves to ensure the best possible outcome?

Just like the little plant, we need our time in the sun. Sunlight gives us not only vitamin D, but it warms our cells and energises us on subtle levels. The suns rays also carry energy to us, energy that informs our physical and energetic bodies and assists in the assimilation of information.

And every little plant needs to have its feet in the earth. So too do we. Earthing is an ancient practice of connecting to the earths magnetic field. As beings with our own electromagnetic field, connecting to the earth will literally anchor our energies as we entrain to its frequency. This calms our nervous system and brings our cells into harmony with our surroundings.

When we experience an uprooting in our lives, our physical body often holds the keys to our ability to navigate with ease, or with stress. Change, even small change, can trigger the nervous system into fight, flight, or freeze. It's the unknown that is the trigger. The part of our nervous system that responds this way is ancient, and is designed to keep us safe. The unknown isn't seen as safe because, well, it's not yet known and therefore isn't certain. With uncertainty comes anxiety, and with anxiety comes lack of ease. And so the cycle begins. 

The way through this is for the nervous system to shift into another mode. The way of relaxation and rejuvenation. This is the parasympathetic nervous systems sweet spot. It's where our physical body gets to rest and heal, to integrate and process.

How do we make the shift when all around us is newness and uncertainty? Here are 6 simple techniques to use next time you’re feeling uprooted.

1. Use your breath.

Activating your breath will give your nervous system a signal to begin to make the shift from sympathetic to parasympathetic.  To do this, inhale, then exhale twice as long.  Breathe like this for a few moments, or minutes if you can. This breath will slow your heart rate which tells your nervous system that you're safe.

2. Give yourself a hug.

Literally! Place one hand on each arm with gentle pressure, just like you were giving a hug. This acts on the nervous system as well, sending a signal that you're safe, you're being held, that you're ok.

3. Butterfly Hug

Similar to a the hug above, but gently tap each hand on the opposite arm in turn. This activates the vagus nerve, yes another part of the nervous system. It's incredibly soothing and comforting and is simple to do anywhere.

4. Feet on the ground. 

Standing with your feet on the earth allows you to connect into the earth energy field. Just standing on the ground, at a beach, in a park, is enough to begin the shift.  With practice you might even feel the drawing up of the energy through your feet and legs. 

5. Gentle movement.

Sometimes when we're highly activated, doing high intensity exercise actually can work against us as it promotes high energy, high heart rate, and shorter breath. Next time you want to exercise and calm your nervous system at the same time, try going for a gentle walk. Allowing your attention to rest with each footfall. Just walk. Don't think about anything else other than each step. 

You could also try gentle Hatha Yoga, or simple stretching. 

6. Connect to your body.

Somatic exercises (which some of the above are) are a way to 'listen' to your body. It means you can then be more response to your own needs and give your body what it needs, when it needs it. For instance, if you feel into your body and become aware that you're thirsty, or tired, or feel irritated, then you can more easily resource yourself with exactly what you're silently asking for. All of which supports your nervous system to switch as it's receiving the signals that it's being cared for and is safe.

The techniques will help you anchor in the newness of change as an energy that is familiar. The more you use the techniques, the more familiar they will become and the more your nervous system will become accustomed to change itself. 

It's a process of teaching yourself that change is ok. 

Remember, change itself is neither good nor bad. It's our response to it, the way we think and feel about it, that makes us believe it's one thing or another. 

The more we familiarise ourselves with change being something that is supportive and expansive and designed to position us to thrive, the more we can embrace and embody all that it brings.